The Prudent Portrait

Hi, my name's Lauren, this whole blog is probably just going to be a ton of photos I've taken... but it's okay... 'cause that's the kind of stuff I love.

May 23, 2012 9:03 am

ergh

yesterday was literally the worst day. ever. it started off good… I was almost done with my period, I had picked up my boyfriend and was going to petsmart to get some bedding for the hedgehog. We were listening to a comedy skit by Steve Martin in the car and laughing and having a good time. And then we got back to my place… dun Dun DUUUN! 

He wanted to go on my computer, so i let him and i was sitting there just doing nothing for a super long time and then i asked him if he wanted to go out and look for jobs with me and * surprise surprise* he didn’t want to. Anyway, I started to get annoyed that he wasn’t actively looking for a job so I told him that it was getting on my nerves because his excuses are:

1. I don’t have good internet at home.

(and I think that is a pretty legitimate excuse, it’s a bit hard to do a 30 pg app if you’re on dial-up)

2. When I’m over at your house spending time with you I don’t want to be filling out job applications.

(that one is a bit iffy for me because… I mean, come on. You literally spend about 75% of the time with me on my computer downloading DND pictures onto your flashdrive)

And really that’s about it. So it annoys me that when I offer to drive you around all day so that we can find you a job you say no, and then when I say that you need to get started on finding a job, you get huffy.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’ll give credit where credit is due. You applied to UPS and McKays… but to be honest I shouldn’t have to be proud of you putting in an application… to be honest I shouldn’t have to push you at all. You should just want a job seeing as you’re going to be a 21 year old man who has never had work experience. 

Okay. Now back to the day. So he started to go on the computer-grudgingly to look at applications. I got tired of all the key-slamming that was going on so I told him I was going to go and tan a little bit. So I go outside and tan…. Of course I start getting stressed because he’s obviously mad at me for bringing up his lack of employment, so I decide to go back in and apologize for getting all up in his grill about needing a job. He’s still upset. He pretends he’s not. But he is. So, I offer to move this whole opperation down into the basement so that I can at least watch some tv or something. (after I apologized I figured he was going to stop looking at jobs-but he didn’t….[he should have though because he didn’t have his social down and therefore couldn’t apply to anything]) By this time I’m getting really nauseous. So anyway we go down and he’s still looking stuff up, all upset and I tell him to stop and just have a good time, and he brushes me off. By this time I’m getting depressed. I don’t want him looking for a job to be like a punishment. BECAUSE IT’S NOT. But that’s how he’s treating it. So- like a girl, I start to cry. And when I start to cry I don’t stop crying. He notices and pulls the blanket from over my head (i put a blanket on my head when i cry because i don’t want people to know that i’m crying) and tells me to stop crying. I tell him that I shouldn’t have been pushing him so hard and it’s a thing he needs to decide on his own and that I’m sorry for being mean about it and that I love him. He proceeds to say that he loves me more. Which I say NO! I LOVE YOU MOST! Which he rebuts with…… "whatever." Surprise! “Whatever”= more waterworks. 

Long story short. I was crying all day. On my day off. ALL DAY. We finally hammered things out and got onto a good page. But yesterday- the last day of my period was terrible.